For those who are unfamiliar with the concept of a hitchhiker’s guide, or who do not understand sarcasm, the primary purpose of this website is humor or parody. While the information here can and should be informative, it should also be taken with a rather large grain of salt.

    Should you find anything in this guide that you disagree with or in fact know to be false, please do remember the golden rule first laid out in The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, “The Guide is definitive. Reality is frequently inaccurate.”


Contrary to popular belief, this is not a clever way to insult a journalist. A newshole is a print term referring to the number of column-inches after advertisements that remains in the paper for news. Papers with a small newshole will be unable to print all of the day’s events, while papers with a large newshole will cover such trivial matters as how many hotdogs the governor ordered for lunch. To date, no newspaper has ever reported having a newshole that was just the right size.


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