Disclaimer

    For those who are unfamiliar with the concept of a hitchhiker’s guide, or who do not understand sarcasm, the primary purpose of this website is humor or parody. While the information here can and should be informative, it should also be taken with a rather large grain of salt.

    Should you find anything in this guide that you disagree with or in fact know to be false, please do remember the golden rule first laid out in The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, “The Guide is definitive. Reality is frequently inaccurate.”


Barack Obama


Barack Obama was the 44th president of the United States and the country’s first African-American president. It must be noted that by African-American, we mean his heritage can be traced to Africa, not that Africa is his place of birth. This, unfortunately, needs to be repeated, as an orange-skinned German-American championed a popular conspiracy theory that the Hawaiian-born Obama was actually born in Kenya.

We must also remind the reader that, despite Attorney General Jeff Sessions’ claims, Hawaii is an actual state of the union and not an “island in the Pacific.”

At any rate, contrary to the deep belief of the left side of the political spectrum, Obama was not some type of Savior and did not really spend the first six years of his term cleaning up a mess he inherited, despite his claims in practically every public address he made for the first six years of his presidency.

His accomplishments include governing by executive order, increasing the power of the presidency to dangerous levels, thus allowing his successor to do the same, and dragging the country so far to the left that the right felt a deep need to “take their country back.”

Incidentally, Barack Obama owes his election to the presidency to the same thing Donald Trump owes his presidency to. Both were at one point the alternative to Hillary Clinton, who is quite possibly the worst presidential candidate in United States history.

While other presidents made significant statements like “Ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country,” and “The era of big government is over,” Barack Obama is most known for his oft-repeated refrain, “Let me be clear.”

Photo by DonkeyHotey

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